I accepted a position. I did my first day yesterday. I had taken the position with the full disclosure of my illness and the problems that could arise if I don’t stick to my plan of 6 hour days. I know what happens, it’s happened before. I accept a position, I get really motivated and take on more work than my poor body can handle and then I relapse. And I can not afford this health problem. My family cannot bear to see me go through this kind of health issue again. The price of not adhereing to my body’s need to keep a steady pace, rest and sleep well are not worth teh months it takes to get back to normal health again. The high amount of steroids and the high amount of methotrexate take me months to wean down after I flare.
But, I over did it yesterday. I worked a full 8 hours. This doesn’t seem like much. And to my work-a-holic past I used to be, 8 hours is equal to 7 seconds. I have a very strong work ethic that I feel compelled to finish all the work that is placed in front of me. My heart begs me to keep seeing one more patient, and my sense of responsibility reminds me that I am the only OT in the hospital. This is going to get me into trouble. My body will break down and I will get very ill. Last night my legs ached so bad. Thsi morning I am due to work at another hospital andmy feet tingle and hurt. I must let them know soon that I must adhere to my health’s mandatory needs, or suffer 😦